


Sleepless Nights

by thejokinghatter



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Divergence - Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Fluff, Fuckin civil war didnt happen, I mean like after finding bucky that shit didnt happen ok, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Rated T for language, Sadly, They dont kiss in this, this is just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-22
Updated: 2016-08-22
Packaged: 2018-08-10 06:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7834165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thejokinghatter/pseuds/thejokinghatter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky has nightmares so he doesn't sleep. Sam learns this and offers help</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleepless Nights

**Author's Note:**

> The wonderful tinyzombies beta read this for me <3 go show her some love pls

Sam sighs, rolling onto his side in bed. He knows he needs the sleep, having not slept well for the past few days, but he just can't fall asleep. It's extremely aggravating, especially because he had tried everything he could think of to fall asleep; counting sheep, listening to calming music and sounds, being in complete darkness, leaving his phone on the bedside table, and clearing his head. Well at least he was _trying_ to clear his head.    
  
His thoughts keep coming back to the same thing, the same person. There's a constant "How did my life get to be like this" in Sam's head and it's slowly driving him mad. He'd be just sitting on the couch, minding his own business, and the thought would just salsa into his head, distracting him from whatever he was thinking about or doing. Or he'd be in the middle of a meeting or sparing. It just welcomes itself into his head no matter what he's doing.    
  
He knows that he should entertain the thought, considering it has been bugging him for days now but he just doesn't felt like it. It is a valid question though. How had his life gotten to be like this? He used to just run meetings and counsel at the VA from Monday to Friday, 8 to 5 (unless he was hosting a meeting, to which he wouldn't leave until around 9) and on Saturdays he went to the gym and ran errands. Saturday nights he either went to a bar or stayed in to watch Netflix and eat food and on Sundays he cleaned up or baked. He ran every morning before work and made himself breakfast and coffee. His life used to be routine. Sam likes routine.     
  
But now his life is a huge jumble of uncertainty. He can get attacked at any point in time or they all could be whisked away on a mission on a day that he has plans. He has to keep his schedule as open as possible, just in case something happens and that's so annoying because Sam wants a life again. He wants to be able to go out for coffee with his work friends after work and he wants to be able to check on the veterans that come to his meetings. He wants to run his own goddamn veteran meetings instead of staying at Stark's tower waiting for something to happen.    
  
And then there was searching for Bucky for months. It's true that Sam hadn't had to go with Steve but someone had had to watch his dumb ass. And he hadn't expected it to take so damn long, which was stupid since Sam had known that there wasn't much to go off of. Of course, they had ended up finding Bucky and bringing him back home. Or at least back to Stark's, where Sam has been living ever since they had brought Bucky back.    
  
Thankfully, Bucky had been mostly back to himself when they found him so there wasn't much fighting to get him to come with them. But then Stark hadn't wanted Bucky to live on his own floor, both for his safety and for the safety of Stark's tower or some shit like that. Steve doesn't live in the tower and neither did Natasha, not that she would have even housed Bucky. And everyone wanted him to stay in the tower so they could keep an eye on him.    
  
Which was how Sam got stuck with living with the former soldier. Sure, the place is huge but Bucky had always seemed to be near Sam. Usually a room away or on the other side of the room but still close. But as time went on, Bucky started getting closer and closer. One day he'd be on the other side of the couch the entire day but the next day he'd be planted firmly in the middle of the couch. The next day he'd be closer to the side of the couch where Sam sat.    
  
Within two weeks Bucky had taken to sitting beside Sam or putting his legs on Sam's lap as he stretched out. The first few times Bucky invaded his space Sam complained. But when he realized that Bucky reverted into his head less when he was touching Sam he stopped saying anything and would sometimes find himself rubbing Bucky's calves and missing his touch when Bucky moved away.    
  
It's ridiculous to be honest. Everything about his current life is ridiculous.    
  
Sam turns onto his other side for a few moments before giving up on trying to sleep. He clicked on his phone and groaned when he saw that the time is 3:15am. That means that Sam had been rolling around trying to sleep for a good 3 and a half hours.    
  
He sets his phone back down on the bedside table and heaves himself out of bed, not bothering with pants or a shirt, figuring Bucky wouldn't be up. Sam opens his bedroom door and steps out into the hall, making his way towards the kitchen. He's a few steps away from entering the kitchen when he hears the fridge door slam, followed by things being set down on the counter fairly loudly.    
  
It's Bucky, Sam realizes when he walks into the kitchen. He must have made extra noise to not startle Sam. It was something he had started doing a week ago, when Sam yelled at him for being silent. Sam still felt bad about that, even though he had apologized for it.    
  
"Hey Bucky," Sam greeted, walking up to him on the other side of the kitchen's island. "Why are you up?"   
  
Bucky shrugs, pouring himself a glass of pomegranate juice. For some reason the man really likes that stuff. "Can't sleep. You?"   
  
"I can't either."    
  
Sam watches Bucky take a drink of his juice, smirking when some of it dribbled out of his mouth. But his smirk disappears as he watches Bucky wipe the trail of dark liquid away with his index finger and then suck on it, eyes finding Sam's as his finger touched his tongue. Sam swallowed hard, watching Bucky's mouth until the other man removed his finger, making Sam quickly avert his gaze.    
  
"Uh, I was gunna go watch t.v., if you wanted to come join me," Sam said awkwardly. It's the first time Sam's outright asked if Bucky wanted to join him. Usually Bucky just walked in and sat down whenever he wanted.   
  
Bucky drinks the rest of his glass before answering. "Sure."   
  
Samy gives a small smile and then makes his way to the living room, completely unaware of Bucky's gaze on his ass. He sits in his usual corner of the couch, turning on the t.v. to the food channel. An episode of Cake Wars is on to Sam's happiness. The theme is Star Trek.    
  
Bucky joins Sam in the living room a few moments later, sitting directly next to Sam, close enough that their thighs are touching.    
  
They sit in silence for a while before Sam opens his mouth to ask Bucky a question.    
  
"Hey Bucky?"   
  
Bucky glances at him, raising an eyebrow.   
  
"When do you sleep? You've been up every time I get up in the middle of the night and you stay up until at least after I go back to my room."   
  
"I don't sleep. My mind has the scary capability of being dark and demented." He adds the second half dryly and Sam gets what he means. Nightmares and things of that nature.   
  
Sam already knew that Bucky must have some sort of nightmares. Who wouldn't, with what he's gone through? But he didn't know it was that bad. "Are you afraid of your dreams?" Sam asks a couple moments later.    
  
It seems like a stupid question to him but Sam wants to know the answer. He wants to know if he can help Bucky, if he can do anything.    
  
It's a little while before Bucky answers and when he does he looks down at his lap, busying himself with scratching something off his pants. "Yes," he says quietly.   
  
Sam's heart breaks a little at how sad Bucky sounds. He doesn't know what to say. Doesn't know how to help.   
  
"It helps sleeping with someone, I think," Bucky continues. "Steve used to bunk with me when I got nightmares and it helped. But Steve's not here and I can't depend on him anymore so I just don't sleep."    
  
Sam takes a moment to process Bucky's words before responding. "Do you think it was just Steve that helped?"   
  
Bucky turns to look at Sam. "What?"   
  
"Do you think it could work with someone else?"   
  
Bucky blinks. "I don't know. I never tried. Besides, where am I going to find someone who's willing to lay down and cuddle with a former assassin?"    
  
Sam just raises a slight eyebrow and looks to where Bucky is leaning into Sam, who had shifted so that they are both comfortable. "Oh geez, I don't know. Definitely not with the person you've been cuddling up to pretty much every day." The sarcasm in his voice is clear.    
  
Bucky rolls his eyes and huffs. "Shut up, Birdboy."    
  
Sam laughs for a moment before turning back to Bucky. "I mean it though," he says, voice softer than before. "There's enough room for two in my bed and the door is always unlocked."   
  
There's a hint of a smile of Bucky's face. It's enough to show Sam that he was heard and that Bucky would probably think about it. That's good enough for Sam, though if Bucky doesn't start sleeping soon he might just slip him some sleeping pills. Although that might get him killed.    
  
Sam goes back to watching the show, rolling his eyes when the bakers mess up on something simple and laughing at the faces the judges make. And at some point Bucky manoeuvred his way to be sitting up against Sam's side, back to him. Sam rolls his eyes and taps Bucky's back, motioning for the man to sit forward a bit     
  
Bucky, in confusion, moves to stand, thinking that Sam is kicking him off the couch. Sam gets his legs on the couch, back to the couch arm before Bucky is even standing. He tugs on the back of Bucky's pants, pulling him back.    
  
Bucky allows himself to be pulled back until his back is flush against Sam's chest, Sam's legs on either side of his. Sam snakes his arms around Bucky's chest and rests his head on Bucky's, facing the t.v. again. Bucky doesn't question it. Instead, he shifts to get more comfortable and closes his eyes, eventually falling asleep to the steady rhythm of Sam's heartbeat and the rumble of Sam laughing.    
  
He sleeps like a log for the rest of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> this is rly short I'm sorry  
> Come find me on Tumblr @ gh0st--babe  
> Or on instagram @ gh0st__b0y  
> Or on snapchat @ gh0st-babe  
> Send me prompts if u want


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